100 ways to annoy people

Annoy people
Annoyed kitty

  1. Correct their pronunciation and grammar for every sentence they speak.
  2. Interrupt them in the mid of the sentence multiple times.
  3. Tell their unnoticed joke loud enough again so that the entire group laughs now.
  4. Ask too many questions. Just say 'why' at the end of every sentence.
  5.  Pay no attention at all when someone is talking to you.
  6. Keep checking your mobile all the while when they are talking to you.
  7. When someone asks a question pretend that you didn't hear that or just smile.
  8. Throw subtle insults and if they get offended just say that they don't understand sarcasm.
  9. Enter the lift or public transport before people can get off.
  10. Stand real close to someone in lift. Bonus points if you do this just after smoking.
  11. When someone says they don't know something which you just talked about, instead of explaining them, just say- 'omg you don't even know this, then you probably know nothing'. Get everyone's attention to this situation on how they know nothing
  12. If someone is not interested in some hobby or skill which you have, just call them a loser.
  13. Do all the things in this auto rickshaw article.
  14. When someone shows a pic on their phone to you, snatch it from them and swipe in all possible sides.
  15. Whats the fun in standing queues , jump them. If you can't then at least push people, don't just stand there like a civilized person. 
  16. Ignore traffic signals and cross the road whenever you want. No red signal can override your hand that can stop anything in this world. 
  17. Eat making noises.
  18. Eat with open mouth.
  19. Talk with food in your mouth.
  20. Burp and fart as loudly as you can.
  21. When a person helps you, just point out how they did it wrong.
  22. Don't return the things you borrowed from people even when they ask you. 
  23. Crumple pages from the book you borrowed. You can even underline stuff and tear or fold pages. 
  24. Place your wet towel on bed or on other peoples wet towel.
  25. Throw things everywhere when other person just keeps organizing everything all the time. 
  26. Discourage people before they even start something. Criticize them if they try something for few days and stop -"I knew you will quit".
  27. Baby talk to people. Aww.
  28. Share good morning , good afternoon, good evening and good night messages with flowers and sunshine pics everyday on Whatsapp.
  29. Judge peoples job and career, obviously you know everything.
  30. Forward chain messages.
  31. Give unsolicited advice to people on how to live their life.
  32. Call relatives only on exam results day and ask them how much did their kids score.
  33. Txt on1y lik dis..kewl
  34. Stalk a person everyday.
  35. Keep saying the F word just like that for no reason at all, it makes you kewl.
  36. Be the moral police and correct someone's values and principles.
  37. Peep into other person's phone.
  38. Read other people's diary. Why just stop at reading Anne Frank's diary?
  39. I me myself. Brag all the time. Talk only about yourself.
  40. Keep asking people when will they get married and why are they not married yet. It's your birth right to question.
  41. Contradict every statement made by someone.
  42. Never pay in any situation. What are other people for?
  43. Every time a person from your group leaves, gossip about this person.
  44. Tell someone to do something infinite times.
  45. Give a person an example of a great person and compare them. Tell them how useless they are. You can even compare with any other person actually.
  46. Force some activity on someone and when they protest, ask innocently - X is doing it, why can't you do it?
  47. Just be rude for no reason at all. People love being treated like shit.
  48. Share pics on Facebook on how a million likes will save a child. Or how a billion likes on some God pic in 7 seconds will bring them good luck and utter misfortunes if they don't.
  49. Get ready at snail's pace when going to movies or concerts with other people.
  50. Tell teetotalers how they are so un-cool for not drinking alcohol.
  51. Give people a high dose of your superiority complex.
  52. Spot the person who is plugged in and working seriously at their desk. Go and talk to them, they are lonely.
  53. Only talk about your spouse- 'he is cho chweet', all the time.
  54. Only talk about your baby-even after five years of their birth - 'They said "pfft" today!'
  55. Attend all your conference calls at office from your desk and put them on speaker at highest volume.
  56. Tell women instructions on how to live their life. They need your guidance.
  57. Remain silent in any conversation. Play the mannequin challenge.
  58. Overtake people in traffic jam from the left side. Bonus points: if you hit at least one vehicle.
  59. Advocate people to vote for a politician because he is from your caste.
  60. Tell people you are vegan/vegetarian all the time though no one asked you.
  61. Ask someone whom you know only professionally about their very personal things.
  62. Say 'k' and save 0.000123 seconds of your life.
  63. Call all your friends while watching a movie in theater.
  64. Tell spoilers of a movie loudly in theaters.
  65.  Talk to the person with whom you are watching the movie in theater. They may get bored otherwise.
  66. Be the BBC, spread everything you heard or didn't hear. Make it spicy, add some masala and spread the rumor. You are doing a great social service.
  67. Keep asking people when will they have kids. What's the point of evolution if you refuse to reproduce?
  68. Conclude everything to religion- science is progressing now, but you know sages did this long back. All Christopher Nolan movies are based on puranas.
  69. Get angry for no reason. Stir a storm in a teacup. 
  70. Make people wait for you. They love investing their lives in waiting for people.
  71. Be the most pretentious person in the room.
  72. Be a holy person and comment on the dressing style of someone. Bonus points: if you can comment on their values and their family for not teaching them values.
  73. Force someone to attend some distant relative's(whom you barely know) wedding or other event when they are utterly disinterested in attending it. Bonus points; if you make them wear whatever you want, to make them presentable.
  74. Decide and tell people how they need to spend their time.
  75. Belittle any positive thing about someone- 'Oh you read, you must be so phokat(free/idle).'
  76. Let your kid wreck havoc at someone's house-'awww, he is so mischievous.'
  77. Become a sales person and closely follow people and ask them repeatedly if they need help, even if they say no multiple times.
  78. Let the universe enjoy your sneezes and cough spells, why guard your mouth?
  79. Only see negativity in any situation. 
  80. Keep honking at red signal in traffic. The more you honk, the faster the red signal will turn to green.
  81. Smoke in a person's face, they need some fresh air.
  82. Make someone eat everything in the world on the pretext of love and care.
  83. Why take a bath or even brush teeth when going to a public place?
  84. When you meet an old friend when you are with someone else, just go and talk to that old friend and don't introduce them to each other. That person will just stand there looking awkwardly questioning their existence.
  85. Tell someone that they can't wear their favorite black dress as it is inauspicious.
  86. Be an 'Yolo' enthusiast. Degrade the meaning of 'Carpe Diem' even more.
  87. Just because it's 2017, you don't have to behave radically. Preserve your prejudices and fears based on religion, caste, gender and race.
  88. Tell women that their career isn't that important, because..duh..they are women. In fact, why do they need a career? 
  89. Stare at people. It's not being a psycho, they need attention.
  90. Overuse perfume and watch people sneezing whenever they meet you.
  91. Ask for a party for every damn thing- 'New dress, party!'
  92. Believe in your heart that your wife is meant to be in the kitchen. In fact, her Hogwarts letter was addressed to Wifey, The Kitchen.
  93. Have an opinion on everything? Well let the world know, in the most aggressive way-- Arnab mode ON.
  94. Don't just speak to your group, speak to the entire floor, they want to listen too.
  95. Speak loudly on phone. Technology isn't so advanced yet that normal audible voice can be carried over to distant places.
  96. Ask as many doubts as possible in a session. That session is only meant for you and your doubts, not for the actual session sake.
  97. Speak continuously. Stop only when the other person's ears are bleeding or their brain has exploded.
  98. Tell people that their music taste is shit and your's is awesome.
  99. Treat subordinates or people who earn less than you as slaves and show no respect at all. That's how it's meant to be.
  100. Tell people how they should invest their time in something productive instead of their silly and time waste hobbies.
  101. Ask people how much they earn. Doesn't matter if you just met them.
  102. Take the entire space on sidewalk and walk like a boss. Other people don't deserve the precious sidewalk.
  103. Found someone younger than you? You can lecture them and say anything rude to them. Because..duh..you are the privileged elder who ought to be respected no matter what.
  104. When someone says that they are depressed, the right reaction is "Lol, it's just your feeling bro". Don't let them convince you otherwise unless they turn into self harm or worse.
  105. Be judgmental and make this list.
  106. Get annoyed that there are more than 100 items in this list.
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Comments

  1. This comment has been removed by the author.

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  2. I'm pretty sure that I've known people guilty of almost everything on this list! The last 2 definitely made me laugh! :)

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  3. What a funny post! I think that the people that annoy me follow this list perfectly.

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  4. Omg, 106 was my fav. I loved them all, and then I saw 101 and had to go back to the title of the post. lol

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Cool, you noticed it at 101 itself ! :)

      Delete
  5. I love your blog and this post made me laugh out loud!!! I'm really annoyed when someone eats with an open mouth or when I'm interrupted when I'm telling an interesting story :D

    ReplyDelete

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