Hang In There

Sometimes everything seems hopeless. It gets hard to just get through the day. You don't want to talk about it with anyone, cause you are worried of coming across as a cry baby or being told how many people have it worse than you. So you try to contain it all within yourself and put on a brave face. You try to find some help online in posts or in books or in movies - anything which may provide you with some insights. Then you may again feel "what's the point? - they aren't going to help anyway". You know this path way too familiarly - cause you have been through it many times. You hate yourself for being stuck in this maze all your life.

Sometimes, the anxiety is unbearable - you try to find comfort in food or sleep. Other times, you feel nothing and don't even feel the need for any comfort. What is worse? May be, it's the self hatred phase - where you avoid confronting yourself, where you feel disgusted by yourself and keep blurting out "I hate myself" through out the day.

If truth be told, you may or may not turn around your life. No one can know for sure.

I guess the best thing to do right now would be to just hang in there and hold tight.