20 Ways To Numb The Existential Crisis
Where will you be when the next wave of existential crisis strikes? Come to a standstill and stop the entire traffic on a busy road? Shower? Sleep? Work desk? Stare at a stranger in a restaurant unknowingly as you are lost in thoughts?
Here are a few tested ways to deal with it swiftly:
What if hoooman is not the pet and I am the pet? |
Here are a few tested ways to deal with it swiftly:
- Binge watch TV series. Make sure you start with another immediately as soon as you end one series.
- The only way to get through life is to sleep through most of it.
- Keep scrolling, never stop. Internet has infinite options to keep your mind off the dreaded things that need attention.
- Go to The Cave(Fight Club) and let the penguin casually tell you to slide(The ability to let that which does not matter truly slide.)
- As Phoebe would say - Go to your happy place..la la la la..
- When life gives you lemons, sniff cocaine. What's your cocaine? Books? Movies? Video games? Cocaine?
- Live in a reality distortion field(inspired from Steve Jobs). Quote something which isn't accurate with a mesmerizing charm and soon people around you will believe that what you say is the reality - voila, that's the new reality now. Bend it(reality) like Steve,y'all.
- Fall in love with food - only case where 'The More The Merrier' makes sense.
- One thing you need to absolutely stay away from is - Thinking(in the sense of self-reflection). Just imagine that you are on Vogons' planet and if you think, you get smacked in your face.
- Get involved and lost in one of the myriad elements of this chaotic world which are all quite important - Met Gaala fashion, GOT finale, 999$ Apple stand, cricket match..
- Accept that the meaning of life is 42 and move on.
- Just work - doesn't matter if it's your calling or not. It's just one third of your life anyway.
- Diffuse the situation of philosophical thoughts in shower by singing or screaming(same in my case) out loud. Focusing on the backside of your 100% pure organic shampoo will also help.
- Pretend to have an epiphany in one of your travels - better if it's some kind of solo trekking, makes up a better instagram pic with a pretentious quote in italics(or comic sans-not judging) about life.
- Nietzsche and Nihilism are not what you want on a Friday night or Monday morning or ever.
- So you organized your wardrobe yesterday, but did you do it today? Re-organizing is a great loop to stay distracted forever(that's what my office does all the time, re-org leaders as if you are shuffling a deck of cards)
- Switch on party mode in your brain by exposing it to loud music. It can't "think" now. Stay away from Paranoid Android.
- Try to find a safe haven in religion and faith. Oh wait, but they also say that you are "nimitta matram"(just an instrument in the grand scheme of things)
- Be Rancho and tell(bluff) yourself that "All is Well", whenever your brain starts throwing tantrums.
- Be a dog. Or a cat.
~
All is well, folks.
All is well, folks.
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