The Accidental Guest - Short Story

The Accidental Guest

Dan's eyes closed off as his hand slid across the notes gripping the pen loosely. His phone rang at it's maximum volume blasting off Rammstein. He woke up with a jolt and switched off the alarm quickly. He looked around in a daze, trying to make sense of where he was and what he was doing. He looked at the trailing ink on the paper made by his sleepy hand.

Right, I was studying. Damn it.

Dan had exams in a week and having wasted all the time in his academic year, he was trying to ace the exams as gracefully as he can. He had been burning the midnight oil since a week and had set alarms for every half an hour. He hated Math, especially Calculus. Most of the time, he had  no idea what he was studying. He forced himself to write down every step, so that at least some of the concepts will make it to his brain. He poured himself yet another cup of coffee. The coffee never woke him up, only gave his exhausted mind and body more anxiety and jitters. When he felt his desk shaking, he thought that the coffee was showing it's magic. But these were no jitters or hallucinations of a half sleepy brain.

What the hell..is this an earth quake? Oh my God! Mom-

Before he could call out for his parents, he was shocked into silence by a whirlpool of red smog that raised to the roof. The lights in the room went off and the source of the smog seemed to be at it's center. It was a blazing fire ball. The room got so hot, that Dan started sweating. He cowered into a corner. Soon, the fire took a shape - the shape of the devil himself. There was a rumbling noise, Dan shut his eyes and ears with his hands. When the noise faded out, he felt the room had become cold. He opened his eyes. There was a - creature, standing in the middle of his room. Dan couldn't scream, he was shell shocked.

All right, whom do you want to get killed? - spoke the creature in a dead voice.
Wha..What..Who are you? You..genie?
The creature rolled his eyes and pointed to his horns - You think a genie has horns?
Ohh..oh my God, are you the devil?
Um..I would prefer to be called Satan.
God!
No, Satan.
Please don't kill me.
Why will I kill you, you are the one who summoned me. I will kill whoever you want me to kill.
Wait..what? I didn't..I didn't summon you. I don't know what you are talking about. I don't even know how.
Well, you just did. - Satan grabbed Dan's notes and showed it to him.
What about that? That's just Calculus..integrations, you know..
Satan looked at the notes closely - These are no integral functions, these are ancient spells locked up in Vallhalla to summon me.
Dan looked at his notes, which he never understands himself.
So..whom shall I kill?
Kill? I don't want to kill anyone. This was a mistake. I didn't summon you intentionally.
Oh. Well, this is awkward..ugh..fine, send me back, if I start now, I will be back in my room for Bay Watch.
What?
Send me back, kid.
How? Sorry...I don't know how..
What in the hell? Just send me back like how you have summoned me up here.
Dan grabbed his notes and pen - Please don't be angry, just tell me the integrals I need to write and I will do that.
I don't know what you need to write! Only a summoner will know the spells to send me back.
Oh...I..may be I can google that?
Google what??!!
How to de-summon Satan..
The devil seemed to have grown, with his red face turning maroon. Dan fell into his chair as Satan took a step towards him.
If you kill me, you will be stuck here forever..let's just do what we can do? Please..


~

For the entire night, Dan and Satan tried several Google suggestions which involved a wide assortment of things - pentagon, candles, lemon, lamps, white blanket, spooky music, ropes, makeshift ouija board, swiss knife, crayons and many more. Satan kept his rage to himself and went through the process with Zen like patience. He had his doubts on Dan's intelligence and he seriously thought that the solutions from stackoverflow won't be helpful here.

Well, we tried everything. Oh..wait, I have an idea, how about I trade my soul to you and in turn you make me clear my Calculus exam?
What?! How will that help me go home? And who told you that I am interested in souls? I only kill people.
Ugh..then you don't really have any powers, do you? Even humans kill other humans.
Satan's face grew red again, Dan wondered if it's out of embarrassment or out of anger.

An idea struck Satan's evil brain.
If integrals summoned me, differentials would de-summon me! Yes! That's it! Here, kid, do your scribbling - Satan thrust Dan's notes and pen into his hand. He looked at him almost with puppy eyes, eagerly waiting for the master.
Dan looked around and averted his eyes, not meeting Satan's gaze, tapping the pen on his knees.
You don't know the Math for that? Do you?
Dan smiled sheepishly.
Aarggh..for hell's sake!

~

To this day, Satan is helping Dan to learn Calculus and find the combination of formulas that will send him back home. But, in his heart, he has accepted his fate of forever being condemned to Earth.

~~ 

For more stories, please see Short Stories